About the same as my 401(k).
Wait, they get bonuses? Why do they get bonuses if they didn’t make any money?
NEW RULE: If you work in finance and you don’t make a profit, you don’t get a bonus. In fact, you should have your salary cut by the same percentage as you lost for your clients.
Michael Jackson’s album is being developed into a musical.
Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
This is probably the weirdest dream I’ve had that I can remember.
It started off with me and a whole bunch of others living in a small 19th-century village. Apparently, the village was constantly attacked by dragons, and the village elders needed someone to go and kill the dragons’ leader, Artie Lange. I, being the tallest, strongest, and most handsome, was given the task.
For several days and nights, I subsisted on berries and leaves and was able to track down Artie in his secret lair…a supermarket.
The next day at noon, I ran into the supermarket, grabbed an ax (because they are always out in the open at supermarkets) and tried to kill him by chopping off his head. There was a problem. The ax never did any damage to him. He just stood there laughing an evil laugh and eating a cupcake.
I had failed my mission.
It was at this point that I woke up and vowed not to remember any more dreams.
The preceding dream was brought to you by Maker’s Mark.
Related
Flight Simulator is their oldest continuously updated product, but that may have changed due to their recent layoffs. They shut down the wholly-owned studio that makes FlightSim, but they don’t go so far as to say they are ending the product’s life. Microsoft’s spokeswoman Kelda Rericha:
We are committed to the Flight Simulator franchise, which has proven to be a successful PC-based game for the last 27 years
I used to love FlightSim when I was younger, but don’t have the time to play it now that I have real responsibilities. I can’t imagine it’s a huge seller since most youngsters would find it quite boring compared to the video games available these days.
Did my disk just go up in value?
It was shown only once, but was replayed constantly on the news and written about by newspapers for days afterward. Not only did it launch the Macintosh, it also launched the great Super Bowl commercial craze that is sometimes the best part of watching the Super Bowl. Apple definitely got their money’s worth.
Some of the advice:
—If you’re traveling with your parents over Halloween, don’t let it stop you from doing what you would normally do. Dress up in some imaginative, elaborate costume (if you are like us a pack of Juicy Fruit and a Vampiress) and trick-or-treat down the plane aisle.
—When your dad throws out the first pitch for the Yankees, go to the game.
And the best advice (on their father):
Many people will think they know him, but they have no idea how he felt the day you were born, the pride he felt on your first day of school, or how much you both love being his daughters. So here is our most important piece of advice: remember who your dad really is.
Amazing pictures from around the inauguration, the country, and the world. The amount, and diversity, of people is amazing.
For the horologists out there, the watch he’s wearing in #36 is a Jorg Grey JGC6500, which was a gift from his Secret Service detail.
I wonder why Former President Bush chose to label the envelope he left for President Obama with a Post-It Note rather than just label the envelope (#48)?
He waited on line with his mask on.
I’m guessing he doesn’t watch a lot of movies.
A nice alternative to the bag-o-chemicals you normally use in the microwave. Love how the butter melts from the top.
For the holidays, my mother got me a Chia Garfield as a gift. In early January 2009, I “planted” it. Just like the last time I planted a Chia Pet, I’m going to document this one.
Continue reading…
A delicious spoof of the last eight years in America.
On Gore’s handling of hurricane Katrina:
And Gore’s decision to single-handedly venture into a flattened house in Mississippi and free a trapped two-year-old showed him to be an irresponsible showboat. Sure, President Gore knows CPR, hears like a German shepherd, and has the strength of 10 men – but we didn’t need to see it.
He’s a highly regarded safety for the Florida State Seminoles who was expected to be an early round pick in the NFL draft. He’s decided to forgo his final year of eligibility at FSU, and skip this year’s draft, because he won a Rhodes scholarship.
The opportunity to attend Oxford next year as a Rhodes Scholar was one that you couldn’t pass up.
Good for him. Nice to see this as opposed to the standard sports-star-in-trouble-with-the-law story.
On the original edition:
If you are a child of the seventies and were raised on “The Joy of Sex,” you are not likely to have forgotten the illustrations. The woman depicted in these drawings is lovely, and, even nearly forty years later, quite chic. Her gentleman friend, however, looks like a werewolf with a hangover.
On the current version:
[...] what you are left with is something that bears little resemblance to the subversive, explosive original. “The Joy of Sex” redux becomes generic — Cook’s Illustrated with boobies.
I like Cook’s Illustrated. With that aside, it does make sense. The seventies were the sexual revolution and an instruction manual would have brought risque, fringe behavior to the forefront. These days, most of those same behaviors are freely talked about on Oprah, the news, reality TV shows, etc. There are a lot less taboo sexual subjects these days.
Not unexpectedly, Google responds.
Update: The author of the study says he never mentioned Google in the study at all and that “the Times had an ax to grind with Google”.
Each type of Pepsi will have a slightly different logo with the white band either grinning, smiling, or laughing. Their other brands are going to get a refresh as well.
I saw this commercial during one of the bowl games and thought, “Whoa, Pepsi is going to be pissed that someone stole their logo. I’m sure their lawyers are already…oh…they’ve screwed up their own logo on purpose.”