Category: Humor

Bowl Games I’d Like to See

There are about 32 college football bowl games, and they are all sponsored by corporations.  I’ve always felt that the corporate sponsorship missed the boat on them by not tying in more closely with the name and themes of the game.  Below are a list of bowl games I’d like to see:

• The Home Depot Toilet Bowl
• The Kellogg’s Cereal Bowl (how is this not a real bowl already?)
• The Apple iBowl
• The Hershey’s Squirt Bowl
• The Starbucks Soy Latte bowl (only Starbucks drinks served at the game = the most wired, and poor, audience ever)
• The FedEx Overnight Bowl (it’s guaranteed to end by 10:30am)
• The Pfizer Viagra Bowl (it automatically ends if the game lasts more than 4 hours)
• The Google Beta Bowl (the game works perfectly, but it never comes out of beta)
• The Poland Springs Water Bowl
• The Domino’s 30-Minutes-or-Less Bowl (6-minute quarters + 6-minute halftime = shortest bowl game)
• The Microsoft Windows Blue Screen Bowl (game play has to stop at least once a quarter while they reboot the computers)
• The KFC Famous Bowl
• The IKEA Ünferter Bowl (no one knows what it means, but it takes 30 minutes to set up and everyone in attendance gets an Allen wrench)
• The eBay Bowl (if there’s a disputed call, it takes 30 days to get it resolved)
• The MTV Music Bowl (at least there’d be one thing musically related to MTV)
• The Kleenex Snot Bowl
• The Motorola RAZR BWL
• The Morton Salt Bowl
• The Grey Poupon Mustard Bowl
• The Cuisinart Mixing Bowl
• The Jell-O Shots Bowl
• The Playboy Party Bowl (everyone wears pajamas...and the cheerleaders...whoa!)
• The Coca-Cola Flavored-Sugar Bowl
• The Zagat Review Bowl (the recap of the game is, at most, five sentences, and pithy)
• The Play-Doh! Rose Bowl (everyone in attendance gets enough Play-Doh! and instructions to make roses which are thrown on to the field after every touchdown—the grounds crew has five minutes to clean them all up otherwise they will get hard and be useless to make anything else)
• The Body Shop Cocoa-Butter Bowl
• The Olive Garden Never-Ending Bowl (the teams keep playing till they ask for the check)
• The Las Vegas What-Happens-In-Vegas-Stays-In-Vegas Bowl (there are no recaps or clips about the game—it’s like it never happened)
• The Toyota Supra Bowl
• The ESPN SportsCenter Bowl (the two teams don’t play, they just watch clips from all the other bowls)
• The Greenpeace Mr-Splashy-Pants Bowl (can’t be played because it’s not dolphin safe and has a negative carbon footprint)
• The Sony PlayStation 3 Madden Bowl (the two teams just play Madden Football on a PS3)
• The Trojan Rubber Bowl
• The Heineken Keg Bowl (biggest kegger ever—second only to The Playboy Party Bowl as the most “fun” bowl to go to)

Do No Evil?

Google’s philosophy is generally credited as, “Do no evil.” Perhaps they need to explain their stock’s closing price today:

Radio Flyer Twist Trike also makes coffee

I was talking with my boss about his kids and their tricycles and, out of curiosity, I wanted to see what Big Wheels looked like in this day and age, so I hit Amazon.com to see what’s out there.  I found this cool new trike that seems to convert between a big wheel and a coffee maker.  What will they think of next?

Funny Billboard

During the recent trip to Philly, I saw this ad for Chick-fil-a.  I thought it was cute.  Never been to a Chick-fil-a, but a few people at work like it.

Mastercard commercial

I’m not sure why, but I really like that Mastercard commercial where Peyton Manning is cheering and asking for autographs of people doing their regular jobs.  I like the part where he stands outside a restaurant and cheers the employees going home, and then is so happy when one of them throws him their apron.

However, my favorite part of the commercial, and they don’t show it every time, is after the Mastercard logo, at the very end of the commercial, Peyton hands a loaf of bread to a supermarket employee and says, “Could you sign this for my little brother”.  Priceless.

Fun stuff you can find on the Internet

I’ve been pretty tired this past week and as a result, spent a lot of time sleeping today.  As a result, I’m wide awake and kind of a little bored.  It was with all this free time that I found out that if you use Google and search for “human organs” a somewhat humorous/scary sponsored link comes up in the results.

Reminds me of what happens if you look to buy batteries on Amazon.com.  If you look at most of the brand name battery entries on Amazon, you will invariably see a “Buy it used” link.  I looked at condom’s on Amazon hoping to find a “Buy it used” link, but no such luck.  Now that would have been really funny!