Growing up in Manhattan means that you sometimes have to do things a little differently than, well, pretty much the rest of the country, and as Halloween approaches, and I compare stories of youth with colleagues and friends, I’m beginning to understand just how different Manhattan Halloweens are compared to others.

An atypical example of Manhattan Halloween decorations

I’ve heard about it from friends and seen references to it in movies, but since I’ve never seen it in person, it’s sort of like Bigfoot…I’m beginning to doubt it really exists.  In Manhattan, there isn’t that one special house in the area that goes overboard with Halloween decorations; that one special house that everyone from several streets over comes to visit because everyone knows they have the best candy and obscene amounts of it; that one special house that truly embraces the spirit of Halloween and shames all the others around it for even trying to be festive.  Unless you live in an area that has single-family townhouses (which is somewhat rare on this island) you really won’t see Halloween decorations, or any other holiday decorations, adorning the outside of a building.  Multiple dwelling abodes must conform to the lowest common denominator wishes of its inhabitants, and it’s always safest to not display any decorations than risk offending someone who, for whatever reason, is offended by Halloween.

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The “Nutjob” Part

One of the stocking stuffers that my father gave my mother for the holidays this year was some Mint Chocolate M&M’s.  During lunch, they came up in discussion, so I took out my iPhone and pulled up my review of Mint Crip M&M’s from May.  Since my parents really don’t know how to use the iPhone, I had to zoom in on it so they could read it.

This zooming hid the fact that it was my review that I showed them.

During the discussion, the question of “who reviews M&M’s?” was asked, and was quickly answered by my father as, “some nutjob with too much time on his hands.”  After pointing out that the “nutjob” in question was me, my father quickly backtracked as best he could, but the damage was done.

My shrink loves my parents, by the way.

The Milk Chocolate M&M’s Review Part

Mint Chocolate M&M’s are quite delicious.  They are chocolaty and minty, and that’s what you want in a mint chocolate candy.  As you can see by the photo, there is a large white chocolate center that is infused with mint flavor surrounded by a decent amount of dark chocolate, which gives the candy a more minty flavoring whereas I prefer a nice balance of the two.  On the taste factor alone, I would be apt to give it a 7.5/10, but I’m reviewing an M&M here, not your standard run-of-the-mill after dinner mint.

Mint Chocolate M&M’s are part of their Premiums line.  The outer coating of a Mint Chocolate M&M is a mottled, dark green coating and, unlike normal M&M’s, is made out of wax.  There’s no hard candy shell that has made sure that M&M’s “melt in your mouth, not in your hand” for decades.  These will melt anywhere, especially your hand, and probably at the most inopportune time.

The hard candy shell is what sets M&M’s apart from other bite size chocolate candies.  It’s the hard candy shell that has made M&M’s one of the most widely recognized candies in the world.  Just because you create a bite sized chocolate candy and stamp an “M” on it (in some cases a “W”, a “3”, or an “E”) does not mean that you’ve made an M&M.  These are nothing more than every other mint chocolate candies in a slightly fancy package.

Rating: 4/10

In the run-up to any big summer blockbuster, there are usually any number of tie-in products hoping to take advantage of the cross-promotion possibilities.  With ‘Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’ right around the corner, M&M’s has introduced a new variety, Mint Crisp.

I picked up a pack to give them a try, not really knowing what to expect.  Upon opening, I was greeted by M&M’s that were colored with the three generic mint related colors of white, light green, and mint green.  I was also treated to a slight minty aroma.  The candies themselves were about the same size as the standard crispy M&M’s, but their shells were less uniform in shape. In keeping with the tie-in to Indiana Jones theme, some of the M&M’s have an additional symbol printed on the side with the ‘m’. Upon biting one in half, I could see there was the standard candy shell, a layer of mint, chocolate, and the crispy rice center.

As for the most important characteristic of the new variety, taste…they tasted exactly like a crispy Andes mint would.  Since Andes are the gold standard of drug-store chocolate-mint candies, this is not a bad thing at all. Would I have them again?  Yes, absolutely.

Rating: 8/10

Today is garlic day, and after making and consuming some wonderful garlic parsley shrimp the other day, I realized that I love garlic.  Specifically, I love the aroma of cooked garlic.  I got to thinking, “Why doesn’t someone package that aroma and sell it?”

My first thought was Yankee Candle.  If they made a light garlic scented candle, I’d buy it in a heartbeat.  But why stop there?  Almost immediately, my head started swimming in garlicky ideas. Garlic scented car fresheners; garlic scented mouthwash; garlic scented deodorant; garlic scented body wash; garlic flavored gum and candy; the list could go on and on.  How come these items don’t already exist?  I couldn’t be the first one to think of them, could I?

That’s when it dawned on me that the garlic aroma is not exactly loved by everyone at all times.  I happen to love it when it’s used in cooking, and it’s not too strong.  Other’s might not like that, and I guess that’s why we don’t see garlic flavored/scented items.

Jelly Belly did make a limited edition roasted garlic flavored jelly bean. I would have liked to have tried it.

I do like the idea of garlic scented deodorant, though…it would keep the vampires away.

Skittles advertises that you should, “Taste the rainbow”.  I always thought that rainbows were bright and colorful, but tonight I found out that they can be dark and monochromatic.  They can also taste pretty good.

For whatever reason, I had a craving for chocolate tonight.  I tried to fight it, but it was too strong, so at 10pm I found myself on my way to the corner newsstand to get a Hershey bar.  What I found there was something surprising…a package of Chocolate Mix Skittles.  Since I had a craving for chocolate, and since I like Skittles, I decided to give it a try.

It’s a normal sized pack and claims to have five flavors: S’mores, Vanilla, Chocolate Caramel, Chocolate Pudding, and Brownie Batter.  First off, if it’s a Chocolate Mix pack…so what exactly is Vanilla doing in there?  What does Vanilla have to do with Chocolate, other than being it’s arch nemesis?  That aside, I found the taste of Brownie Batter and Chocolate Pudding to be quite good.  Chocolate Caramel tasted just like the caramel square candies, but I couldn’t detect any chocolate in it.  Vanilla tasted like a bland vanilla, not the sharp vanilla that I love.  As for S’mores…I really can’t comment on it because I don’t know what real s’mores taste like, but it was nice nonetheless.  Their consistency is that of a regular pack of Skittles, and the flavors are released almost immediately upon bitting into them.  They are not even close to the amazing taste experience that can be found in a pack of Jelly Belly’s, but in their defense, I don’t think they’re trying to compete with them.

Did they satisfy my chocolate craving?  Nope, and that’s why I thoroughly enjoyed the Hershey bar.  Would I buy them again?  Possibly.  The problem I have is that when I bite into a Skittle I expect to be greeted by a rainbow of fruit flavor, and these are quite different; and that’s most likely its true weakness.

Rating: 5.5/10

The worst part about having a cold and having to go to work (because you are so dedicated) is that Halls and coffee don’t mix, but you have to mix them because your throat hurts and you can’t swallow the coffee without using the Halls to soothe the sore throat.

It’s like some evil catch-22.