The Onion published a satirical news story “U.S. Soothes Upset Netanyahu With Shipment Of Ballistic Missiles”, and about a day later, reports started surfacing that that may have actually happened.
Whatever the truth of the matter, Haaretz, the paper of Israeli doves and liberals, reckons that when life apparently imitates satire so faithfully, it’s generally not a good sign.
My favorite The Onion stories are the ones where you’re not sure if they are true or satire; like this one about Donald Trump. Totally believable.
A plain-clothes officer in England was patrolling the streets when an officer watching the same streets on CCTV radioed in about a suspicious person in the area:
The operator directed the officer, who was on foot patrol, as he followed the “suspect” on camera last month, telling his colleague on the ground that he was “hot on his heels”.
The officer spent around 20 minutes giving chase before a sergeant came into the CCTV control room, recognised the “suspect” and laughed hysterically at the mistake.
You couldn’t make this stuff up if you tried.
Loyalty to any one sports team is pretty hard to justify. Because the players are always changing — the team can move to another city — you’re actually rooting for the clothes, when you get right down to it. You know what I mean? You are standing and cheering and yelling for your clothes to beat the clothes from another city. Fans will be so in love with a player, but if he goes to another team, they boo him. This is the same human being in a different shirt — they hate him now. Boo! Different shirt!! Boo!
The New Yorker explains a Time Warner Cable bill:
$14.32 — Landline you promised your parents you would keep as an “emergency backup” and now you only use to order Thai food
$1.35 — Random charge that’s too small to waste your time contesting
Seems pretty accurate to me. Reminds me of the time they accidentally revealed charging the consumer for the ads they send in the bill.
To prove their point, a South African company used a carrier pigeon to fly a 4GB flash drive 60 miles while at the same time transferring the same data using an aDSL connection. In the same amount of time it took the pigeon and the staff to transfer the data to/from the flash drive, the aDSL connection completed 4%.
And I complain about YouTube freezing up for a moment?
The Guardian gives us a delicious spoof of the last eight years in America.
On Gore’s handling of hurricane Katrina:
And Gore’s decision to single-handedly venture into a flattened house in Mississippi and free a trapped two-year-old showed him to be an irresponsible showboat. Sure, President Gore knows CPR, hears like a German shepherd, and has the strength of 10 men – but we didn’t need to see it.