Monday, April 20, 2015

Let me be frank with you
Perhaps not

Life is short. I’m not too long for it
Hang on Tony. Let me over think this.

Note: Tony = Tony Reali, the host of ATH

Friday, April 17, 2015
A book fell on my head this morning. I have only myshelf to blame.
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
I got caught stealing a calendar and got twelve months
Thursday, April 16, 2015
They should make a Minecraft movie; it would be a blockbuster
Fishermen are reel men
Tuesday, April 7, 2015
I may not have finished first in the bracket challenge, but I did beat Frank

Note: Frank = Frank Isola, another panelist on the show

Spring is here! I’m so exited I wet my plants

Note: (more like he's so excited he left out a 'c', amirite?) [pic]

Wednesday, April 1, 2015
I’m going ahead to the past

DANGER
1.21 jiggawatts

Sorry I’m late I rode my hoverboard today
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Frank, I think we are at that stage as friends where we can insult each other

Note: Frank = Frank Isola, another panelist on the show

Fanny’s Rest Stop
Eat here and get gas

Can February March? No, but April May
Thursday, March 26, 2015
Mr. 2,200
2,200 appearances: the equivalent of “over the hill”
I’m the Kentucky of this show. It’s me vs. the field
Wednesday, March 25, 2015
Cheesy pick-up lines