Reader’s Digest brings us “30 Secrets Your Waiter Will Never Tell You”.

10. Oh, you needed more water so badly, you had to snap or tap or whistle? I’ll be right back … in ten minutes.

And from the I-wish-I-didn’t-know-that department:

28. If you’re worried about cleanliness, check out the bathroom. If the bathroom is gross, you can be sure the kitchen is much worse.